TAMING DAMIAN – Teaser #6

It’s the first day of Spring! It’s Thursday! And there’s a teaser! 🙂

Hi guys! I hope you’re all having a great week! It’s sunny and beautiful here in SF! I hope you guys all get a taste of Spring wherever you are! <3

So it’s Teaser Thursday and below is the last teaser before the release! Who’s excited??? I’ll post on my blog as soon as TAMING DAMIAN is available!

If you’d like to get an email notification as soon as it’s available, please join my mailing list: http://jessicawoodauthor.com/mailing-list/

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You can find the previous teasers here: Prologue, Teaser #2, Teaser #3, Teaser #4, and Teaser #5.

(UNEDITED AND SUBJECT TO CHANGE)

I walked home in a daze,unable to process or accept the test results from today.

Maybe the lab made a mistake? Maybe there was a hiccup somewhere and the tests came out wrong? Maybe this is all just a bad dream and I’ll wake up any minute now? 

But deep down I knew the test results were accurate, and I wasn’t in some nightmare. Dr. Stevens had warned me that this was a strong possibility and that we had to plan for it. But when I found out that the “strong possibility” turned out to be the reality, I couldn’t seem to accept it. In fact, my body hadn’t accepted it, and I had fainted. I had woken up fifteen minutes later to Dr. Stevens’s and a nurse’s concerned faces looking down at me. Dr. Stevens had scheduled me in to see him again so we could plan out my pregnancy when I was feeling a little better. But really, would I ever feel better about these results?

My mind was still in a fog-like state when I arrived home. When my tired body collapsed onto my bed, the gravity of today’s events overcame me and I broke down and began to sob uncontrollably. As the streams of tears flowed down my checks, I wept for everything that had happened today, for everything that I knew was about to happen to me, for everything that I knew I was about to lose. I felt all the stress and worry I’d had from today’s results wash over my body like a dense blanket, sinking me deeper into the bed.

Hours must had passed me by as I laid in completely stillness on my bed, staring up at the ceiling in a wide-awake comatose state. When my phone beeped and brought me out of my trance, I looked around and noticed it was already dark out.

I looked over the alarm clock on my bedside table. 6:43 p.m. Have I been staring at the ceiling for the last two hours?

I grabbed my phone and my breath caught in my throat when I saw that it was a text from Damian.

 

What are you up to? Beth told me she saw you walk past the bar early this afternoon. Did you get off work early?

 

I felt my body stiffen when I read the text. I had never thought living in the apartment complex above Damian’s bar would be a negative thing until now. I knew I couldn’t avoid him, not when we lived in the same building. And I knew I didn’t want to avoid him. So I texted him back:

Yes, I’m home early today. 

As soon as I sent my text, he texted back: Something wrong?

I froze at the sight of his question. Can he tell that something is wrong? I glanced nervously at my phone, and then around my apartment—as if he was around to see my reaction.

No, nothing’s wrong. Just feeling under the weather. I winced when I sent the text, knowing how much of a lie that was.

A few seconds later, he responded:

Come down to the bar and hang out with me. It’s slow right now.

A part of me wanted to crawl under my duvet and avoid reality—to avoid Damian. But yet, another part of me wanted to talk to him, to be close to him, to see him, even if it meant that I had to lie to him until I was ready to tell him the truth. And it was that part of me that won over. I realized that more than anything else right now, I needed Damian. I needed the Damian that I feel in love with, now more than ever.

So I texted him back and told him I’d see him soon. I went to my bathroom and look at myself in the mirror.

I look like shit. I groaned as I pressed my fingers against my puffy eyes. I turned on the faucet and splashed some cold water onto my face. Maybe he’s not going to notice.

I applied some makeup and looked at my reflection.

“Everything will be okay. Everything will be okay. Everything will be okay,” I repeated over and over again, hoping that the more I said those words, the more they’d become a reality.

But as soon as I thought I was calm enough to face him, my composure cracked and I started crying again. “Why?” I cried out as tears streamed down my face. “Why did this have to happen?” My thoughts went to Damian and my heart ached at the thought of losing him. “Don’t I deserve happiness?”

I felt myself spiral down into a state of hopelessness as I saw the fairy tale happiness I envisioned for me and Damian crumbling in front of me. Just like I had lost my parents ten years ago, I was going to lose Damian.

My hands moved to my stomach and I shut my eyes, trying to fight back the tears. “Look on the bright side, Alexis. You’re pregnant with a baby. Maybe it wasn’t the best of circumstances, but that’s something to be thankful for, right?” My words felt empty as I tried to convince myself things would work out.

Maybe things won’t be so bad. Maybe Damian will stay. Maybe his love for me is strong enough for this.

I laughed out loud at the thought, but they came out as sobs. I knew I was only kidding myself to think Damian would stay in this relationship. I could tell something was wrong between us. He had seemed distant the entire week in Italy, which had scared me because that could only mean one thing: he was getting cold feet about being in a relationship. I knew that I was the first woman he’d ever been in a real relationship with. First I thought I was just being paranoid, but during our last day in Italy, I had told Damian I loved him and he hadn’t said he loved me in return. If he is having regrets about telling me he loved me, how would he handle this news about me being pregnant with—

My thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of my phone.

Damian! I immediately thought and my heart skipped a beat.

I reached for the phone and felt both relieved and disappointed when I saw who was calling.

“Hi Chris.” My voice shook as I answered the call.

“Hey hun. Are you back from the doctor’s? Did you get the test results?”

“Yeah.” I fought back the tears as I relived the visit in my head.

“So … what did the test results say?”

“I’m pregnant, Chris.”

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Who’s getting excited for TAMING DAMIAN! I’ll let you guys know as soon as it’s live on Sunday! 🙂